The Narrows - "Alligator" CD (Wantage USA)

"Alligator" compiles "Days are Numbered" and "Six Ten," the first two full-length releases by Bellingham, Washington's The Narrows. That said, there are only seven tracks in all, but together they clock in at over an hour in length.

The Narrows' music is often moody, similar to a blend of slow-core and post-rock that evokes the deliberate pacing of Codeine, the eloquent dexterity of Slint and the drawn out determination of Engine Kid and Karate.

While songs such as "Stride" and "October's Problem" might lull the listener into a soothing state of relaxation, standout tracks "A Simple Turn of Page" and "Need for Progress" demonstrate that The Narrows are capable of creating amazingly loud intonations alongside dark and sinister tones.

As is the case with most releases on the Wantage USA label, the CD itself is a D.I.Y. labor of love, from the music's home-cooked recording feel to the handscreened CD packaging.

While the CD has some bombastic and beefy moments, evidence suggests The Narrows' would sound best in the live setting through a thunderous P.A. or in a sweaty, beer-drenched basement party. I believe the latter might be the better setting.

"Alligator" is recommended for fans of power trio rock, all the way from Blue Cheer and Creem to Federation X and Shellac.
Gratuitous linking

Here's a story I wrote for work on why the Super Bowl is of no consequence.

I'm covering the Michael Jackson trial for work.

I've already become somewhat of an expert on the case.

And it's hard to believe that I get paid to create things such as photo galleries of Desperate Housewives and Sundance Film Festival, but I do.
John Peel: Teenage Dreams So Hard To Beat

This special one hour documentary celebrates the life and work of John Peel.

Presented by Jarvis Cocker, it features contributions from artists and DJs such as Led Zeppelin, Billy Bragg, Pink Floyd, Ash, Orbital, the Cure and Captain Beefheart (...more)

Note: The show has moved. Follow link below.

Link: Teenage Dreams
Top 5 Rodney Dangerfield jokes

1. I was an ugly kid. When I was born, after the doctor cut the cord, he hung himself.

2. This girl was ugly. They used her in prisons to cure sex offenders.

3. I know I'm getting old. When I whack off I get tired holding up the magazine.

4. Hey, I gotta be honest with you. I'm not a fabulous lover. My wife and I were in bed on our wedding night and she said, "Well honey, this is it." I said, "Honey that was it."

5. With my wife I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it.

I love Rodney

Rodney Dangerfield is one of my all-time favorite comedians. I used to love watching his Tonight Show appearances and his ability to shoot off one-liner after one-liner and make it seem effortless.

I finally got around to reading Rodney Dangerfield's book, "It's Not Easy Being Me," which I thought was really great.

The book is full of Rodney's trademark hit-and-run jokes that are placed throughout the book.

Rodney's childhood sucked really bad.

His dad was a serial womanizer and was rarely around the house. Rodney's mother never showed him any affection whatsoever. There was little love in the Dangerfield household.

When Rodney's father and mother were together, they fought viciously. Rodney says, "most kids fall asleep listening to a fairy tale. I fell asleep listening to a guy yelling, 'Enough! I've had enough!'"

Rodney's talent bloomed early.

He got into the comedy scene at a relatively early age, worked hard and went for it whenever an opportunity presented itself. As a result, by his early 20's, he was a regular on the New York comedy scene doing gigs in Manhattan as well as upstate.

During that time, Rodney enjoyed himself like most men his age; he drank a lot and bedded women. Lots of them. And he worked hard on his act. Then one day, he met a woman and married her. He had a child.

Rodney decided to give up comedy to live a real life. He became a salesperson, hawking aluminum siding, which he did for over a decade.

As he endured the grind of a 9-to-5 job and the pressure of coming up with his next sale, he kept notebooks and continued writing jokes.

He did this for almost 15 years. At age 40 he decided he'd had enough.

He ditched the wife and lame sales job and pursued what he knew he was best at: comedy.

He had no problem making crowds laugh and word spread quickly that Rodney was back. He started catching some major breaks and ended up doing his routine on the Ed Sullivan show.

Slowly but surely, Rodney's popularity grew.

Because so little went right in Rodney's personal life, he thought he could make that the basis for his act. At the time, "The Godfather" was at the height of its popularity. Rodney went and saw it, and learned how the concept of respect was important to gangsters.

Rodney took the cue, and that's how the "no respect" joke was born.

Rodney eventually became a famous comic in his own right, opened his own comedy club, appeared on the Tonight Show numerous times and helped launched the careers of dozens of comics including Jim Carrey, Bill Hicks and Sam Kinison.

Throughout his life, Rodney was a habitual pot smoker right into his 80's. The funnyman also battled severe and chronic bouts of depression.

Rodney had a supreme gift of appealing to a huge audience and he gave us many years of laughter. His legacy is one that will be hard to eclipse.
Captain Janks

Here's a story I wrote about Captain Janks, whose phony phone calls are heard regularly on The Howard Stern Show.

phillyBurbs.com: NBC10 at mercy of Howard Stern prankster

Link: The Interactive Captain Janks Website
Monday, Monday

It snowed in Delaware this weekend. About eight inches, though it seemed like more as I was digging out the car.

Two movies you don't need to bother with: The Forgotten and Paparazzi.

The first 30 minutes of The Forgotten were promising, the second 30 minutes started to get really cheesy and the final 30 minutes were laughable.

As for Paparazzi, bad acting and bad script add up to a bad b-movie disguised as a first-run movie. The only reason I rented it was because Robin Tunney is in it. I guess she can't get any good roles?!

Listening to the new one by Camper Van Beethoven, Joanna Newsom, The Narrows and Mike Lupica's Hip Transistor.

Been working on a new mix CD. Need to finalize it, write some liners and post it. It'll probably show up here sometime.

Latest work project: Michael Jackson trial blog.

I'm writing up daily synopses of Wacko Jacko's pending child molestation trial. The allegations that are surfacing in the case are pretty disturbing, to say the least.
Lamb of God - "Ashes of the Wake"

Holy hell, can I just say how killer this album is?

Lamb of God's blend of wickedly tight metal brings to mind the precise crunch of Helmet's first album with a slight nod to math metal (i.e., Opeth, Confessor, Loincloth) and a whole lot of metal ass-whuppin throughout.

I heard the band played on Sirius' Hard Attack channel and have been diggin' em ever since. Here's the leadoff track from the album and the album's closer.

Official site: Lamb of God
By the numbers

Just the other day the guy who sits next to me at work was bumming out that his blog, Numeralist, wasn't getting any traffic.

He was thinking of giving up, but I encouraged him to keep on with it.

Just two days later, he wrote up an interesting analysis of the U.S. before and after four years of Bush.

Now his site is getting hammered and his page views are through the roof because sites such as Totalfark and MSNBC have picked up his story.

I told him that his piece was his "Catcher in the Rye" or "The Great Gatsby" of blog posts.

Here's another thing that the Numeralist wrote:

Analysis of a debate between George Bush and Jacques Chirac set to a Dr. Seuss poem.
Phew

Cranked out a few record reviews like I promised myself I would do. Also posted some MP3s since a lot of you enjoy that sort of thing.

Uh, Something I Learned Today has an MP3 by 76% Uncertain from one of my fave hardcore albums, "Nothing But Love Songs."

I spent some time reading Suze's rants on her site. Actually her writing isn't ranting.

She puts together free-flowing accounts of her life which involves seeing LOTS of live music, taking pictures and hanging with her buds. Yeah, it's usual kind of spew, but she's got a knack for drawing in readers with her cool off-the-cuff style.

Things I'm going to buy today: Puppy training pads, breath busters, a humidifier, take-out dinner.

Things I already bought today: Frozen cauliflower, Kleenex, diet black cherry soda, diet coke (regular and caffeine free), spring water, gouda cheese from Holland, Blueberry Morning cereal.

Things I want to buy, but can't afford or don't want to spend on: TiVo, Slayer "South of Heaven" CD, pair of New Balance sneakers.